never play flip cup with pint glasses
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
