I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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