everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
