I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize