Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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