the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
