I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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