i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
