3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
