so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
