she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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