I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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