The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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