i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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