the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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