No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
