She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
how drunk are you?
Several
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
