what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Randomize