i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
