I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
