well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
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