is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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