That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
