Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
In other news, I just burned my penis
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
