Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
