she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
