How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
we're making bets on your personal life
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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