So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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