My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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