There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
