Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
