is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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