On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
