He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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