I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
