handjob tips. give me some.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
