Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
no you cant smoke seaweed
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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