you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
you would pick up someone in the library
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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