Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
