i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
