Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
