**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
