Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Randomize
