OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
