You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I love having hate sex.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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