When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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