Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize