Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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