She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
