I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
