He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize